He
woke up in room filled with light. He had no memory of how he got there. He
remembered a sharp pain in his chest, a dark figure stood before him, he
remembered her, weeping over his corpse. He remembered fading into darkness,
then from the distance there was a voice which reminded him of all he would
lose, and who he would leave behind should he die. Then her face stood before
him, covered in blood, she whispered, “Don’t leave me.” over and over again.
Then he heard an unfamiliar voice. “Sir…Sir, are you alright?”
He
was woken by a man who stood next to his bed. He had never before seen this
man, “Am I dead?” he asked, not sure what the reply would be. The man, who
looked as though he was the doctor, was short, and quick, he had short grey
hair, and a white coat, that had clearly seen plenty laundry days. The doctor
seemed startled by his question, but eventually found a reply, “You’re fine,
not a scratch on you actually, the lady who brought you here said you took a
bad fall. Young men, always trying to impress the ladies by doing stupid
things.” He was surprised at the doctor’s comment, he had no memory of who he
was, or how he got there, let alone of this ‘lady’. “I'm sorry where am I?” he
asked. The doctor studied him for a while, and then leaned on his bed, “You’re
at the hospital, you were trying to build a tree house for the neighbours
children, then you fell out of a tree, hit your head pretty bad, but the
scanner shows, that you are going to be fine.” “I don’t remember any of that.” He
said rubbing his head. The doctor had a worried look on his face, “What do you
remember?” He asked. “I remember a forest and a woman…she was covered in…”
There was a knock at the door, a tall woman, with deep dark hair, and a weary
look about her walked in. “I'm sorry to interrupt, the nurses said that I could
come in?”
The
doctor stood up to greet the strange woman, “Ah you must be Mrs L, your husband
is doing fine”. The woman shook the doctor’s hand and looked at the man on the
bed, she looked at him as though she knew him, but he didn't recognise her. He tried
to remember, but her face was not the one he saw. “Honey, I told you that one
of these days you would hurt yourself in that tree, what were you doing
anyway?” She moved to his bedside and leaned in to kiss him. The moment her
lips touched his face, he was suddenly in a somewhat familiar room, he was
packing.
…
He
saw his so cold wife, but not as she was now, her face was the same but different
somehow. She stormed into the room, she was angry at him, “Why are you doing
this to me, I gave everything to you!” He didn't reply, he just continued to
pack. “You will never be happy with her. I will make sure of it!” He lifted his
head to look her in the eyes and said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
She laughed franticly like a mad woman, “You think I don’t know, soon everyone
will know.” She continued, “I will never let you go, I will never let you be
free.” She stared at him for a while, then she began to cry, “Don’t leave, I am
the only person in this world who will ever understand you.” He was done
packing, he picked up his bag and headed for the door. She jumped him and tried
to kiss him, he pushed her away, harder than he had intended to. She landed on
the wooded floor, was lying there in pain not just of the physical kind. He
looked back at her worryingly, she looked up at him enraged, resentment and a
deep sadness. He couldn't help but feel sorry for her, but he knew he could not
give her what she wanted. They shared one final look then he walked out the
door, never looking back. She got on her feet and stood at the door, watching him
as his white shirt disappeared into the forest. She said with burning hatred, “I
will never let you go. I will never let her have you. I promise you that.”
…
He
was back in the hospital bed, but now it was dark, there was no one there. He
was dazed, and the world was spinning. He didn't know what was real, the
shadows seemed to cream and laugh at him. He wanted to call out, but he was afraid
that he would not remember who ever walked in. He stumbled out of bed, almost
falling over, eventually he reached the door. He opened the door there was
nothing but darkness, the hall was so dark he couldn't even see the floor
beneath him. Eventually he found a light at the end of the hall. He heard a
voice, but unlike the others this one he remembered. It was a woman, he knew
her voice, and he knew her. He slowly walked towards the lit room. When he reached
it he saw her. There she was, exactly as he remembered her. She was speaking to
a nurse, “I just want to know if he is alright, it’s all my fault, I knew but I
couldn't stay away. Just tell me if he is alright.” She saw him standing in the
door way, and fell silent, there was a numbing feeling between the two of them.
For
a moment their eyes met, it was as though he was frozen, his mind jumped to
different places at once. He saw her face covered in blood, he saw her body
mutilated on the river bank, then he saw her again lying in the hospital, her
heart stopped. All these terrible images they were all of her, she was dead a
hundred times over. He saw himself weeping over her body all those times, the
crushing feeling he would have. He felt the pain, over and over again.
It
all hit him at once, he couldn't take it, he fell to his knees, exhausted, and
broken. She rushed to his side, and when she touched him more memories
returned. It was her again, they were in a field of yellow flowers, he was so
happy, and the sun had never shone brighter. They were beneath a tree. She was
naked, only covered by light velvet blue sheet, that might have been his shirt.
He was naked too, and they were together, he ran his fingers up and down her
leg. She stared up at the sky, the cloud reflecting in her eyes, he wondered
what she was thinking, but didn't dare to ask. He knew what she was thinking,
“If only this moment could last, forever.” He said. She turned to him and said,
“Forever is too long to hold happiness.” She smiled at him, her smile was
beautiful, genuine, and just enough to fade reality. If he could keep it forever
he would have.
All
these images flashed back as though they were going to consume him, images of
their life together, they seemed to go on forever. She was different in all of
them, yet she was the same. He screamed in agony, she knelt by his side, she
didn't know what to do, she knew what he was feeling, she knew full well she
was responsible. She wished she had never come to see him. No matter how hard
she tried she could never stay away from him. The moment he saw her, she knew
she had made a mistake. He froze and fell out of the tree, as though he had
been paralysed. Now this was all because of her. The nurses came and pushed her
away, then they carried him of to his room. She was left on the floor in tears;
she buried her head in her palms and cried out, “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.”
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